Mother, This is the Way to Face the Terrible Two Phase in Children

Parents are often made dizzy when the child enters the phase of terrible two, ie when the child enters toddler age or 2 years. The child starts throwing things, biting, kicking, and showing other irritating behavior. Be patient, Mother. This is very natural to happen, cok .

When entering the age of 2 years, which is often called the phase of terrible two, the child is still egocentric and feels that everything is centered on him. He has not been able to see from the point of view of others and love others as he loves himself. That is why, children of this age often engage in unpleasant behaviors, destructive behaviors, and tantrums.

Overcoming Unpleasant Behavior in the Terrible Two Phase

One of the most effective ways to deal with a child's unpleasant behavior is to get him to learn to socialize. For example, playing with peers or playing with older siblings or cousins. These methods can help children to develop social skills and empathy.

Then how do we teach values ​​or social rules to children? Planting values ​​in children takes a long process. Mother cannot expect Little to change with just one or two admonitions. So, it takes parents patience in instilling good values ​​in children.

Basically, children learn the values ​​of kindness or etiquette by imitating the behavior of their parents everyday. Therefore, Mother needs to become a role model for Little One. Show how to be kind to others and how to treat others with respect.

It should be noted, Mother also needs to treat Little with respect, including empathizing with him when he is sad, angry, or bored.

Overcoming Destructive Behavior in the Terrible Two Phase

Although children under 3 years old (toddlers) often cause destructive behavior, such as tearing magazines, scribbling walls, or spilling powder on the floor, they really don't always intend to do it intentionally.

This behavior can occur due to several things, including:

• Feeling frustrated, for example because he didn't get what he wanted and then threw things on the wall
• Coordination of movements is not perfect, so that the object in his possession is dropped and damaged
• High curiosity, for example the child is curious what happens if he disassembles the TV remote and ejects the contents

Whatever the reason for your child to do this behavior, you should tell him that the behavior is wrong. Mother does not need to be angry, shouting, or yelling at Little, especially if the behavior arises from accidental.

There are several things parents can do when facing destructive behavior in children in this terrible two phases, namely:

1. Teach children to be more careful

For example, telling a child that a broken glass has sharp parts that can make it hurt, then tell the child to ask an adult for help if he wants to take the glass.

2. Ask the child to help improve the situation

For example, inviting a child to help wipe up the water he spills, glue the piece of paper he ripped, or take the toy he throws and put it back in its place.

3. Give advice to overcome frustration

For example, if a child feels frustrated because he constantly fails to arrange the toy blocks, give tips on how to arrange the blocks so they don't fall easily.

4. Encourage children to explore the environment

Support the child to fulfill his great curiosity by providing a safe environment. For example, give it objects that are not easily broken and toys that are safe.

Facing Tantrum in the Terrible Two Phase

Little who enters the terrible two phases may have tantrums, such as crying out loud, rolling on the floor, or shouting in public.

Children of this age are actually able to read and take advantage of situations. Children know that their parents will not get angry when they do tantrums in public places and will obey their wishes so that they stop doing tantrums.

Generally, tantrum behavior decreases and disappears as the child ages. To relieve tantrums, Mother needs to understand some of the reasons why children in the terrible two phase often do tantrums, namely:

• The need to relieve frustration
• The need to express his feelings, needs, and desires
• The need to feel important, valuable, and want to be cared for
• Lack of self-control and emotional control
• Hunger, thirst, fatigue or boredom

There are two things Mother needs to do to deal with the tantrum launched by Little, namely the handling steps and preventive measures. Here is the explanation:

How to handle tantrums

Generally, tantrum behavior decreases and disappears as the child ages. Some steps you can take when your child shows tantrum behavior are:

• Stay calm and don't deal with tantrums with anger, because a child's tantrums will only become more intense when responded with emotions.
• Speak softly. If a child's tantrum responds with a shout, usually the child will actually shout louder.
• Avoid physical punishment, because this is tantamount to punishing children for something they cannot control.
• Avoid arguing, bargaining, or giving lengthy explanations when the child is doing tantrums.
• Protect the child and make sure the surrounding environment is safe, because children who do tantrums are at risk of injury due to sharp objects or other objects in the vicinity.
• Express empathy when the child is expressing his emotions. Show that the Mother can also feel what she feels.
• Try to hug the child so that the anger subsides or divert the child's attention to something else that's interesting.

How to prevent tantrums

To prevent tantrums, Mother needs to observe and record your child's tantrum behavior for 1-2 weeks. Note when your child did the tantrum and what the trigger was.

After that, do ways to handle tantrums as described above and teach your child to express their frustration, anger, or disappointment verbally (in words) and in a more polite manner. Observe changes in your child's behavior and record them for evaluation.

The annoying behavior of a child in the terrible two phases is normal. However, if this behavior occurs more than 2 times a day, accompanied by explosive emotions, and makes you overwhelmed dealing with it, you should consult this problem with a special child psychologist or pediatrician.

Written by:

Adisti F. Soegoto, M.Psi, Psychologist (psychologist) Label : Family cat_Family